Just want to bang on the drum all day

My creative juices are flowing low like the creek out back. It's this damn job, it's been taking a lot more effort the past month or so. Every morning I get up early, make coffee, take the first cup out on the deck, then hit the computer.......and about this time wish I could stay home from work. I love mornings and would still get up early even if I didn't work. My career used to feed my mind, now it just feeds my body. I still care about a job well done, and success, and pride, but given a choice, I would hang it up. Life is just too short and I can't get to everything I want to do. Imagine having all your time to yourself, for yourself and your family and those you love. Every day. Of course I would want the means to maintain the same lifestyle I do now. Or at least close to it. I could do with less though, I throw a lot of money around that I could easily do without. I would want to be able to travel regularly, a trip every couple of months. Don't really have vehicle envy, don't need a boat or a new wardrobe.

But I sure could use the time, could put it to good use, bad use, useful use, use me, use you, just give me the time and I'll use it wisely at times and with reckless abandon at others.

I hate saying if I just had the time, if I'd just taken the time, if there was only more time.
With the passing of each season I realize more and more that time is such a valuable commodity to me. I don't want to wish it away like I do now, wish it was friday, wish it was the weekend, wish it was time for my vacation....wish, wish, wish.

I want it there staring me in the face every morning, ticking slowly like my morning mind, tick tock time. And I want tomorrow and the next day and I want to forget what day of the week it is and to never hear an alarm clock again. I want to watch my neighbors leave for work. I want that feeling you get right after you call in sick and you really aren't but you put that puny sound in your voice when you call in and they say take care of yourself and you lie and say if I get to feeling better I might be in later.........and then you hang up and pump your fist........that feeling, I want that every day.

I want tempus to stop fugiting, that's what I really want.