There's still time to change the road you're on

Last night, after a busy weekend with my son, it really hit me that this is the last week I'll be spending in this house. The house I came to four years ago this week. The first home that was just me, all mine. And it is me, it's like entering me, it's all there if you look close enough. Some of it a little more hidden but if you know how and where to look, it's there. I'm moving out a different person than I moved in. I'm still in there but there have been enhancements, changes in direction and attitude. This is the place that taught me how to make a space mine, stamp it and define it. There have been others but they weren't mine like this. It's not the biggest, not the best, not the most expensive. I haven't shared a love here, only my son, who has grown into a young man here. We've both learned a lot about how to live in the past four years and I wouldn't change the fact that it's been just he and I for the world. Thousands of hours together being men trying to live well, do the right thing for the most part, relish the vices we allow ourselves cause you have to have some I think. Someone else cleans his moms house, someone else cuts the grass, hangs the pictures, does the decorating and there is very little cooking in the fancy new kitchen. I often think of how different it would be now if I had a teenage daughter instead of a son, don't get me wrong, I have daughters and I love them, loved raising them, but I doubt a 15 year old girl would be as eager to spend as much time with just me. And I know it will change with him as he gets more active, starts driving, dating. But I know he will continue to come around and together we'll build a new life in a new house and continue to be men together and see lots more movies and cook lots more meals and look at and admire a lot more women (sometimes we ogle the same ones, how scary is that?), go to more games together and I'll keep teaching him how wonderful the world is and how old rock and roll is about as good as it gets and keep taking him to the woods and the rivers and the oceans and canyons and the museums and the cities and hopefully he'll someday take as much pride in his home as I do mine and have a son of his own to show the world to.