It seems like I write this fucking post about four times a year.

People I care about are struggling. I can't do much about that, I want to, but I can't. We talk about hugs and love and being there and yes, we can be "here" for others but the hugs are virtual and in the end about all we can offer someone in this medium is support. It's taken me a long time to learn that there is very little I can fix outside of myself and sometimes that doesn't even go so well.

Of most concern to me is the severity of the afflictions. All of us have our bouts of insecurities and emotional highs and lows but it's particularly disconcerting to me when the level of depression involves hospitalization or it impacts the will to live or when it gives someone feelings of hopelessness and despair. It's hard to not know what to say or do. It's even harder to do nothing. Keep your chin up, be thankful for what you have, it'll pass and soon get better........I can't say those things and take them seriously, they're empty platitudes like have a good fucking day. I used to suffer like you are. I know how it feels. All I can say for sure is a day not appreciated is a day that never will be. It's hard to appreciate the really bad ones, nearly impossible, maybe the best it can be is reminding yourself that someone appreciates you.

Last night I stayed away from here until late. I needed the break. I was sad and can only let sad so far in or it will consume me. The boy and I were watching playoff baseball which is something we love to do together. When I got here later something made me click on a blog in my bloglines that I hadn't visited in about three months. You do that? With no intention to stay away you just don't get to some people and usually it's the same people that don't get to you? The tendency is to read those who read you I think. Nevertheless, I clicked.

Anyway, I got caught up in the most remarkable story of two people coming together. I had to read it all. Every word. It was written as two voices but it reads as one. I'm not going to publicly identify those involved without their permission but I'm telling you, it was as beautiful an account of two people meeting and validating love as I've ever seen. Mesmerizing and courageous. It's a depiction that could NEVER be created as fiction. In one way I felt I was intruding on something so very intimate but I also felt that it was a celebration they wanted to share.

For an hour I tucked the sadness into a corner of my heart.

I wish them both the very best.