I just learned it's not all about me

I know, I'm as surprised as you are. The first 20 things about me; not because Charkey did it but because she begged. Begging makes me fold like clean towells.

1. I was raised in the midwest by Ward and June. I wasn't the Beaver though, my brother was.
2. I was shy, quiet, and played well with others.
3. That changed with my first hard on.
4. I went from mowing lawns for money to having others do the mowing and I did the marketing, taking my cut off the top of course. Coupled with a large paper route, I had a lot of money at 12.
5. I started working full time at 16 and had even more money.
   
6. It wasn't really the money; but I purchased my independence, my car, my clothes, my money to date and buy albums (a vinyl pressing that when turned at 33 1/3 rpms under a needle would emit music).
7. Therefore, I was able to drive on 30th Street before I was allowed to cross it on foot.
8. I was seduced by a savy, doe-eyed 17 year old at 6:00 AM while delivering the morning newspaper. Things were never to be the same. I was 14.
9. She used me at her whim throughout that summer then dropped me for a 20 year old hoodlum.
10. I loved her and that was my first broken heart.
11. It was 2 years before I was to experience sex (and love) again.
12. I survived by masturbating daily, sometimes to an exhausted state, and by playing lots of sports.
13. I was a very agile, quick, but small athlete.
14. I physically matured late and and attained a degree of popularity almost overnight; like I was the new kid or something.
15. This is when I learned how to be a bad good boy.
16. I've been that ever since.
17. There were several deaths in my family during my adolescence and that gave me a sense of mortality, melancholy, and inevitability that I maintain today.
18. I was nondescript in high school, working, dating a good girl from another school and sometimes finding a bad girl who would give me what my girlfriend wouldn't.
19. I worked downtown at an insurance company the summer after graduation before my freshman year in college and I loved it. Downtown and becoming an adult. It was time.
20. Everything changed my first year of college. Everything. It was the summer of love and I was all for that. The music was to die for. I got political, my hair grew, I learned how to roll a joint, alienate my parents, have casual sex, and expound at length on a myriad of subjects (see whitey, I avoided plethora).